I Hated the Story of Abraham†

Is it really okay to kill your son if you think god told you to? Why do we celebrate his act in primary school?

The story of Abraham really used to make me question faith,  from childhood. I hated this story as a child maybe because I was a child too. I mean whenever a person watches a movie or hears a story, it is natural for them to place themselves in that story. giving  themselves a point of view within that scene. Probably why in great films like harry potter for instance. They star an ordinary boy who turns out to be extraordinary. It’s just amazing how comfortably my school teachers told me a father laid his son down like meat for slaughter just because of a voice in his head. Maybe I’m different but as a kid, I received that as my first horror movie. I couldn’t help but think how I almost died because of my fathers questionable priorities, his participation in a game God decided to play and because I was too weak as a child to runaway or fully understand my fathers intentions. Indeed this was horror to me but my teachers delivered it with smiles. Concentrating on the faith behind this act and making him sound heroic. I always wondered; What if God didn’t stop him, what opinion would we then have of God. What if it wasn’t even God in his head. Why was he being faithful to something telling him to kill his son. Where was his love for the son. Was it really faith or just fear and cowardice. Wouldn’t we also praise him if he had said no. Wasn’t ‘no’ the right answer. Was it okay to kill as long as you think God told you to do it….. ‘??????????????????’ to all of these questions that shot through me

I didn’t see him as a man of faith but a weak man who followed instructions. I never understood why this was looked at as model behaviour. I shoved those feelings under the rug cos I was also a kid following instructions. My teachers were never wrong and their smiling meant there’s probably an explanation and I just didn’t understand.

I see this clip and realise nothing has changed. I have always felt the same way about this story and some other stories too. They ain’t the same but this clip paints the same picture for me till this day. God/book giveth joy and God/book taketh but have faith and follow him no matter what direction he’s going. I mean this clip didn’t create this feeling  at all but inspired me to write about it.
I dunno maybe i need to sit with someone on this topic who can explain to me why this is okay. At the moment I feel like we are told these messy stories as kids so that by the time we are independent thinkers it would be so normal to us that we don’t question them objectively because it semi worked on me for a while. I questioned it but still shoved it under the rug. I wonder how others felt about this story as kids.

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Watch “Chis Beybé x Nneji – Prowl O’ Lion (prod by SSK)” on YouTube

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Watch “Chis Beybé – Cheap. Guy. Til I. Die. (prod by beatconnexx)” on YouTube

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Die or just Ask???

My guide to asking for favours

So Many ways to approach this

Takes a certain skill or trait to ask people confortably. Sometimes you’re like me and you’re raised to have such an independant mind that asking people for help requires a therapy session(did for me once).

 I’ve crossed that path and my next hurdle is how. I have something to ask every human i know. With so many unique characters and unique relationships a generic message won’t fit all. It’s Overwhelming the number of different ways i can ask a simple question. I want a positive result each time and I have one chance with most.

About to start releasing music and would love all your support. A like and share will go along way


Thanks and blessings

Thats one way

Yooooo everyone small favour. I need to get my numbers up please like and share my page. Its important. Thanks in advance

Thats another.

I could do the side entrance approach

Yo can you check if my page looks okay. I  Need to get people to like it or I lose my producer.


I could go with positive aggression

Yo yo my page is up now. Hurry up and like  it. Make sure you share it too. Lol

Could  guilt them into it

Hey am guessing you didnt know my page was up now. I need you to help me with this. I’d do it for you too when your time comes. I need you guys dont leave me hanging.

Could go with the presumtous approach

Hey man my page is finally. About time right haha. Obviously I know you got my back. How many likes and shares do you think you can get me?

Tryna hit 4000 likes.  

Lets try feeding the energy we need from

Hey hey hey. Am really excited to say my page is finally HERE. Haha I cant wait for you to see my stuff. Its gonna be great. Like, share spread the word and I’ll keep you posted 

Awesome x
Hey hey hey. Am really excited to say my page is finally HERE. Haha I cant wait for you to see my stuff. Its gonna be great. Like, share spread the word and I’ll keep you posted 

Awesome x

Heres my approach.

Brush away the anxiety by writing about it. As an artist should. Hopefully the readers will get your message, Like your page, share your page  and give you their thoughts

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Friday 13th(Light)

Record of my future last 13days on earth continued from friday 13th(Dark)

Its still 9 days till  I die. Time moved so slow today. Those brownies took a while to hit but man they had me buzzing. Its the end of the day and all I did today was get high. I told my wife it was my dying wish for her to eat brownies with me. I got her good. Shes always been a health and  fitness fanatic. Now ganja has her laughing with me in the living room. She’s probably amnoyed on the inside. Haha thats right I’m still a man and I still have influence. Damn she’s so young and beautifull, it makes me feel lucky to be alive. I wanna keep showing her the world starting from drugs haha. This is nice for now though, sitting with her laughing at peppa pig high off our heads without caring about death…..fuc#¤caring

8 days left.

I am the fuckimg man. I cant walk but I can get up. I mean it can get up. I think I definitely still love my wife. She made me a man last night. Even in a wheelchair I have her on her knees sucking my dick, I am definitrly still king. I didnt even want her too fmdidnt know i could get it up. I thank the drugs. It took the pitiful look from her eye. Maybe what it really took was my self-pity glasses off instead. Today is the day of knew year knew me. You’re just reading right now so you probably cant tell I’m on a helicopter. Thats right, YOLO, I got 8 days and I’m gonna live. Theres literally nothing holding me back anymore. I’m about to land on the yaht I bought last night. I couldve hired it for a fraction of the price but why should I save money, *mob* is dead. I’ve got a kingdom at home but I can make this boat my shrine. I’ll infuse my soul into this boat. People will worship it. I’m in a good space at the moment I dont need the drugs to feel better but cocaine is so sweet to me. I’m on pain killers too, what a mix. I’m in more pain these days. I spend more time in my head than I do being active. I’m not gonna pay it no mind. This boat is my final destimation. Apperently I’m suppoded to be maxed out. They dont know who I am. MO syndrome or not I’m gonna live and leave with a bang….fuc#¤M.O.

7 days left 

Life is so sweet. Why the fuck would anyone commit suicide. Ignorant spoilt brats. Yesterday was a blast. I found somethink out about myself.  I found out that I’m a warrior mentally. I’m not giving up on this. A doctor threw some logic/science at me, told me 13 days is all I have and I accepted it like a victim. I am not a victim I am rich I am a warrior and I a have hope. I will not die on my 13th day. This isthe golden age of medicince and technology. Fu$#dying

Tbc ..

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Friday 13th (DARK)

Days Till I die 

I mean we’re in the month of halloween so why not. In fact its the only way to really do this day justice so I’m gonna go for it.This is a list of events I’d like to happen on my last 13 days on earth.

13 days left.

After running the London half marathon(or any) well at 136 years old. My body has slowly begun to  feel numb and heavy. Age has finally started making its move and I’ve stopped feeling young. I am now in a hospital with my great Grandson who drove me here. I’ve just been diagnosed with a disease called maxed out (M.O) syndrome. I’ve lived my life to the max every year never pushed myself too far but never slacked off. Always active, happy healthy and most importantly lucky. Babies randomly get born and strangled to death by their own umbilical cords. Children drown at sea, die of leukaemia or starve to death in America every day. Teenagers drink themselves to death and get into fatal car accidents. Young Adults and middle aged die of diseases get, into  all accidents and get murdered. Old people wither then fall on their head and die, have heart attacks and get killed off for inheritance. what was I talking about?…. I’m 137 and I don’t know how. My body having stayed at optimum levels has pushed my lifespan to its limit and my days are numbers. My bones have started to hurt and thats why I’m here. 13 days left to live my doctor says……. fuc#∞it

12 days left.

I was crying last night. After punching my grandson and telling him to keep the prognosis to himself, the idiot told everyone. Its all too real. A fool messaged me saying how long and fulfilling my life has been. To hell with that, I don’t want to die I still got moves to make. I’m not a passanger I’m a driver. Why am I expected to come out the car like I’ve reached my destination while everyone else goes off without me. I’ve built an empire of Negends I want to stay and rule it. I didn’t do it for my kids I did it for me. It was always for me. I had kids cos I wanted kids. I made them great people cos I wanted great kids. its the only pyramid scheme I believed in. Have kids who will have other kids. The pyramid scheme is perfect cos the top of the pyramid always gets cut off. I was meant to be the one who broke the system. I’ve had a good 72 years as top of the empire(when papa died). Still being alive and healthy at  102years old had me convinced I was new, evolved  and immortal. This hurts. My 49year old wife looked at me like an old man for the first time since we me 8 years ago. She tried to fuck me out of pittance today. I couldn’t even get it up with viagra. she must be cringing right now. “This baron old woman/whore isnt going in my will.” Why am I saying that? I must be angry…….fuc#∞life

11 days left.

I feel amazing “Yes!”. I’m on the path back to happiness.   I love my great grandchildren especially the one who brought me modern candy today. I feel so much better. Pain is still there but its ok. The painful pain just doesn’t hurt. Forget about death. I’m living now. So much to do. How can I think of dying when this hilarious cat is jumping away from cucumbers. A young nurse followed me home from my doctors appointment today.  They said I should use her if I need help while my wife’s at work. haha what liars they must be. This woman clearly wants this dick I’m dying so it don’t count as cheating. If there’s a time to stray from the straight and narrow its now. I won’t though cos she’s ugly. I’m old yes but I still have taste. Why do I feel so good today, what changed?  I’ve never needed help before do I really need her. Important thing now is that she thinks of me giving her the D. I cant explain right now why I’m grinding on the front door. Nurse must think I’m a psycho. If she wants a psycho I’ll show her one, in fact, its really hot in here. I’m taking off all my clothes. I paid for this house in full in 2035 I have a right to go naked in my house If she has a problem with that then fuck the nurse. Haha I haven’t mis-behaved like this in decades. Is this part of my condition, am I losing it.  I need to keep it together but this feels so great. I need to stop scaring my nurse. She’s actually a nice young lady whats wrong with me? don’t matter. I feel good….fuc#∞nurse.

10 days left.

Modern Candy my great grand daughter gave me right. Yesterday I was higher than a motherfucker. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. I love it. How dare she drug me. God bless her she might have saved my last days on earth. I made a fool of myself yesterday. My wife came back home yesterday but I was out of it. I didn’t have to see that look in her eye like I was a broken machine old worn and finished. I dunno maybe she’s trying to be nice. has she changed or have I. What do I want from her? I think I need her to stop being nice to me. That sounds stupid but I know whatever she is doing I don’t like it. She’s changed or maybe I have. I don’t care  but she’s taking time off work for me. Its been a good 8 years with her. Same age as my first grand child. She made me feel so much younger. Now I just feel disgusting what kind of tramp marries a man in his hundreds. I think she married me for money but I love her I think. I’m still sitting here looking at her. Why haven’t I gotten up yet. I wanna be a man. She’s here to look after me like her child. How did life get like this. I’m Negend. I ran a half marathon not too long ago. Bringing me food like I can’t get it myself. I want the nurse back, she was a stranger at least. Can’t tell what hurts my pride more, my wife and family looking down on me with pity or the wheelchair I’m sitting in right now. I want an erection I wanna fuck like a man and know that I can still claim my kingdom.  M.O syndrome is hilarious. Just like that my lil ache has gone but I cant walk or feel my legs either. I wanna sit and cry but instead I am gonna get so fucking high right now. Give me that sexy modern candy  that that makes me feel good….fuc#∞candy

9 days left.

There is absolutely no reason not to take drugs at my age. I watched my mates go senile but thats not me. I’m have a good fucking time. Haha if I fry my brain and die then its for the best. Its no pain no consequences. My wife kept talking about my legacy, utter rubbish. I didn’t live and work to give a fuc% what people think when I die. Besides, I refuse to go senile like I watched my mates do. Todays candy really helped with pain  its not even candy its modern brownies. I feel mellow, relaxed, and I’m smiling.  I shouldn’t be accepting drugs from my minions. What if they get in trouble…….





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Skills and Bills

I was scrutinizing a bible story in my last post. Nothing to do with thst post but have you heard the parable about talents? cos bible got that spot on.

Sitting next to this lovely on the train today. Well I don’t know if she’s lovely. She might be a total bi#$* but she was knitting; that was nice. The knitting seemed like so much effort though, and its a skill I almost learned when I was younger. I just thought it was so cool she was using a skill that I don’t have. The same love/envy I feel when people speak a foreign language around me. Skills are such an important part of the character you’re playing in this life movie. Has me thinking about the skills I failed to pick up, skills I lost, and ones I never use. Hands up if you have a keyboard collecting dust, stopped playing a sport you like for no reason, used to write poetry but stopped or anything similar. If your hand is up, I am better than you. 

Yeah I said it I am Negend and I have changed my ways done so for a while now. It didnt actually atart today. I’ve been tired of this life busting my gut, learning new skills that arent Negend. Going to uni, doing grad jobs and studying while slowly detatching my self from who I really as I neglect all my other skills. My 20+ years of life was not a waste  I wanna learn these generic career skills too but  I will no longer waste the other skills I’ve picked up over the years; comedy, music, sport, filming, creative writing etc. Why do only a small percentage of us see these as viable skills and then another percentage of us who have them don’t and supress them to be accountants, doctors, only.

| : : : .m|l:m.r:-:-.f|s:m.r:-:-.m|f.m:r. : : |

A sound I’m working on

You see thats solfa notation. I read and write music by ear. Very good skill, took a year+ to learn but I haven’t used it in 8 years. My reasons are silly; most people (the world in fact) use staff, I’m not a musician and I don’t wanna lose focus of career goal. Rubbish all rubbish but like I said, I’ve changed my ways. I sing more and make music as well as go to work. Thats one of many skills that make me who I am and I’m proud of it. I don’t wanna die known as just the IT guy who had a few kids. Thats not what I signed up for. I wanna drop a mixtape, make waves with my dodgeball team, make fun videos, fun games and maybe complete a rollerblading marathon.

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‘Its Just an Act’. Doesn’t Work if we Family

Lala Anthony you did Camelo wrong too. (Video)

I just watched this hot 97  clip with shanni being shut down cos hes tryna be smart and silly. The topic wss LaLa and camelos marriage break up. Shanni was trying to say it could be her fault – a domino effect from her sex scene in ‘Power’ the tv show. The idea is foolish the way he’s suggesting it cos that wouldnt make it her fault. If camelo felt a way he should have said, he still chose the wrong path to cheat. I dont really care about their relationship to be honest. Shannis idea was absolutely sound though. For some reason they refused to hear him out. Laura and co were saying “Its just acting”. Erm just acting ?

This interview really had me bugging. Hearing them shout she’s acting like therefor its ok….. huh? Absolutely not! you must be on something. You have the right to make your own choices but your choices affect me and you can’t expect me to have public opinion on this. My wife, this radio personality I married, showing tits on camera. Hell No, unacceptable, you wronged me first and you violated. Having sex on camera, my wife in a popular tv program. F#&* off…. You not with me? Ok

I wanna play a game. Would you rather (must choose one no but or ifs)

 sleep with a goat once (medically clean in this case) and nobody finds  out ever


You don’t sleep with a goat but due to a video or someone lying about you, the world thinks you slept with a goat and bring it up every once in a while.

Personally I’ll close my eyes think of J lo and rock that she-goats world. The point is though, you had to think about it cos both situations are just as bad as the other. Living with what you are or what people have decided you are. What I’m saying is, if it looks like cheating smells like cheating to me and to the world, then you have cheated. It will hurt me the same whether i know its acting or not. Do you really think that when i see you on the screen i see the character you’re playing cos yu changed hair style and wore different clothes?

Which is my next point. I’m your husband so the ‘thespian’ thing is absolute bullocks. The world will see you as the character. I will see my wife being someone else. I’m not alone by the way. Your child will see mummy pretending to be this but its mummy. Your parents their daughter and your friends, our friends whose opinions matter to me and should matter to you too will just see LaLa in costume. When you’re on stage or TV we still think you represent us and your true self. Showing your tits, banging a next man and what not (something  you wouldn’t personally do) are you mad. You think we will say your character did it? Nahhhh YOU DID IT and now we your family are all hurt and have to return to  the community (which you’ve decided to ignore). Return with shame, all because you decided you don’t care how we’ll feel or how it looks in the circle we actually socialise in. I said it before its your decisions. Morally it ain’t wrong, that’s subjective I guess. However it hurts you chose career, the popular opinion and what all them strangers will like, over how we your family will feel over this shame.
This whole time I’ve stressed this woman showing her tits sleeping with a boy half her age but it also applies to men too. It applies to anybody suddenly doing an act on film that would be considered wrong and hurtful to their people at home. If LaLa Anthony was a stripper there would be no problem here because her people wouldn’t consider it wrong. I mean this post isn’t even about their break-up, I don’t know what factors had what effect and I don’t care but hearing hot 97 act like its normal having your partner do these things on TV  is an opinion I reject in Nneji’s name Amen .  I mean If my wife died of cancer and I then saw our son in a film bad mouthing and laughing at cancer patients, it would hurt. If I was eating my wife’s best friends booty like groceries in a film,  both just acting in a play. I’ll expect her to feel a type of way. It’s just an act doesn’t work if we are family

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Alexis Sanchez you’re leaving?

You’re literally the only ray of hope when we face tough opponents but I think it has actually become the most selfish thing ever, asking you to stay in my club

Alexis. I’m assuming you’re leaving arsenal soon and with every right to. Nobody blames you since you’ve done so much for us. You are officially bigger than the arsenal club right now, a player that is bigger than a top tier premier league team. Liverpool (3-1)Arsenal  was the biggest proof of that. Apparently as punishment, the manager of this big club decided it was necessary to bench you our undisputed best player right now. Nobody knows what Wenger was thinking, what I do know is the result. Arsenal in the first half looked like Leyton orient losing 2-0 but subbing you in  later showed the world what it means when a player really carries a team. you made a goal for us after ten minutes and lifted the team. Who says Wenger ain’t petty, maybe he subbed off both our goal scorer and biggest aerial threat to ensure we still lose just to reduce your impact on the scoreline. I say that because all that came of this whole “punishment” was giving you all the leverage. You must be walking with a spring in your step, laughing with your agent right now. You give a 200% on the field doing the work of more than two people but you look around and see people who are playing SHIT!! its not healthy. You’ve been patient enough, I understand if you go. I still and will always love you. You’re literally the only ray of hope when we face tough opponents but I think it has actually become the most selfish thing ever, asking you to stay in my club. Cos if I was you i’d take the chance to visit other cities or cash in at china.



P.S if you dont stay for me stay for this guy click here he needs ya he is hurting baaaddd

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Did I love the wrong woman ( nicki minaj )

I love nicki minaj but the way Remy ma’s bars are setup…

ShETHER hottest diss track out remy disses nicki minaj

I’ve been a fan of nicki minaj for a while. She was an acquired taste but i learned to love her. Remember the first time I saw her on my TV screen without all the weird costume and make up. I had no idea she was so pretty. Had me hooked from then even making me accept the plastic surgery.
Enough of that. Remy destroyed her. Deaaddd. Remy came like a reaper with just bars. Checkout the shether diss track in your own time. All you need to know is that its 6mins of “fuck nicki minaj, you are not the rap queen and you are a fake ass bitch “. I love nicki but the way Remy ma’s bars are setup am back on the fence sitting down wondering if I was wrong to love nicki minaj.

The whole diss track was filled with bars and usually bars are just bars they’re painful but yu can bounce back. However, one bar chamged my whole opinion on nicki forever and has me questioning the woman I love. Remy ma spoke nithing but truth when she said

Dont point fingers like am the bad girl, She the one out here misleading the black girls, all these fake arses influenced by that girl, dying from botched surgeries what a sad world”

My blind love for nicki vanished immediately not only is it true but nicki actually boasted about influencing these girls before and I hate her for it

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